¡Este es mi Año!

Translated, this title means: This is my year. It’s a song by one of my favorite Spanish bands, Tercer Cielo. The chorus of the song hits me every time I listen to it. In English is says: The year that comes will bring better things for me. Yes, I am ready to live with passion, without fear. I will live an intense year because I go in search of my dreams.

Since the first time I heard this song about a month back, I haven’t been able to cease listening to it. Each time I get into my car alone, I quickly hook up my phone and listen to this song, sometimes on repeat.

For some time now I’ve been praying about returning to Peru for a longer period of time, even permanently if the Lord desires. I’ve had a few opportunities presented, but never do they match what I think would be an appropriate timeline or pay scale. With my college loans still looming over me, it can sometimes be hard to trust that the Lord will provide means to pay my bills on a Peruvian salary. Aside from that, schools in Peru run on a February-December academic calendar making it very difficult to begin a school year teaching in Peru when here in the States I’m in the middle of an academic year.

Today a friend made a comment, “You won’t ever go live in Peru.” I asked why she thought that to which she responded, “I just don’t think you will.” This hurt; I felt like I had been stabbed in the heart. Is it because I believe her or because I feel so strongly opposite of her? I firmly believe it’s the latter reason that caused me to feel pain at her words.

I have a hard time believing that God would give me a desire this strong for no reason at all. I know I can help from afar, but not a day goes by that I don’t wish I were in Peru living, breathing, and serving alongside my Peruvian “family”. Don’t get me wrong, life here in the U.S.A. is going well for me. I have a great job, a marvelous family, wonderful friends spread throughout the continental United States, and I recently moved to a new apartment of my very own. However, despite all of these things, my heart longs to be in Peru.

A few days ago I received an email from a co-worker asking about me moving if I was planning to go back to Peru. My response was that I couldn't stay at my parents’ house “waiting” forever. Her response to me was, “All in God’s timing. Sometimes it takes stepping out before the next thing comes along. Amazing what can happen in a few months’ time.” This brought me back to my original search for a teaching position in Peru and how quickly life changed that summer of 2009. I went to Peru on a mission trip in June with the intention of working in the States in August. However, during those two weeks in Peru, God spoke clearly to me and told me I would return. After returning home and talking with many friends and acquaintances in Peru, I found an open door. With much hesitation and a giant leap of faith, I dove through that door with an anxious smile on my face. Just 2 months later, I was back on a plane returning to Peru to teach for 5 life-changing months.

As I begin this new stage of life, in an apartment all alone, I will not allow my friend’s words to hinder my passion and my desire in any way. Upon hearing the song referenced above, I have prayed many times that God would make 2012 HIS year! I will step out, I will live intensely, and I will not stop searching to fulfill my dream of returning to Peru until God tells me otherwise. I know He can and He will open the appropriate door at just the right time, and I won’t hesitate to walk through it.

Psalms 37:4-5 says, “Delight yourself in the Lord and he will give you the desires of your heart. Commit everything you do to the Lord, trust in him, and he will help you.” In Spanish verse 4 says, “he will consider the desires of your heart.”

With that being said, I would greatly appreciate any prayers you will offer on my behalf. Pray for wisdom, clarity, and patience during this waiting period.